Aug 012014
 

I can’t really say that I haven’t been blogging much lately. I haven’t blogged at all, for a reasonable estimation of forever. Today is different.

I’ve talked to my sweetheart, she know what I’m feeling. So what else can I do but write about it? I can’t cure cancer, cure arthritis, reverse againg. I can’t roll back time, slow it down or even make it pass swiftly enough from this day forward. Because time, they say, heals all wounds. I’ve found that to be true many times. That doesn’t mean I want to learn it again. Ever, really, and especially today.

People are laughing today, kids are playing, babies are being born. Wonderful friends are celebrating their wedding anniversary, my own son and his wife just celebrated theirs. The sun is even shining. All across the world people are in love, serving others and worshiping God. Smiles and balloons and dolphins, stories of unicorns and spaceships. Lifelong friends, oceans, tall mountains, cookies and kisses and puppies. This world is a great place, everyday.

Why don’t I hear any birds?

Puppies, yeah. Everyone loves puppies, and how can they not? Loving, loyal, joyful balls of fur and excitement and Ouroboros tails. Want somebody to love you on a day when no one else does? Puppy. They help us remember when we were young. I used to be able to run all day like that too. Making friends from kittens to elephants and the living definition of lazing in the sun. Puppies are great.

Man, is it cold out, or is it just me?

Puppies don’t stay little. Before you know it, they are dogs. When one thinks of loyalty, dogs jump right out. No matter how long your day, how bad your mood, or how rich or poor or fretful or calm you are, dogs make it alright. They protect us and rescue us. Who has a dirty floor that also has a dog? The time between a piece of food hitting the floor and a dog devouring it cannot be measured with modern instruments. I’m not making that up. Rainy days, TV days, indoor days and outdoor days, dogs matter to us and we matter to them. It’s easy to think that all a dog needs is love. Well, and attention and patience and kindness and sticks to chase! But, what becomes of dogs?

Good boy, Rascal

See you soon: 08/01/2014, 1:31pm

Food has no taste today. I don’t care.

Dogs grow to become older dogs. They become more loyal, more patient and more protective. Dogs, it seems, are dogs to the core. They can lose a step, get tired faster and chase fewer sticks. A cat may cross the lawn of an an older dog and live to tell the tale. On a slow day, the senior dog may even seem to ignore the cat. In his eyes though, if you look close, that gleam and the unredeemable instinct are still wholly alive. Don’t be so cocky, cat. As a dog continues to age, more time is spent snoozing and walking and wistfully remembering the cats that didn’t make it across so easily. Nobody is more patient with your grandchildren than an older dog. The thing about an older dog, his mind likes to do a lot of things that his body doesn’t really like to say yes to.

I love my good dog. Our good dog. His name is Baylee, but I never call him that. If he were here right now, I’d tell him that he was a “vicious, rascally, noodle-eating, cherry chocolate chili frito eater, good looking boy dog. Good boy, Baylito. Good boy. So vicious, so pretty.” And he’d stick out his tongue and smile just like he always does. Because he loves us more than he hates the pain he is in. He is a good dog. And we love him more too.

Why does my good dog have to go?

She is here, our caring vet… and it’s done.

Goodbye, Rascal.

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  • I’m so sorry! Hope you guys can find peace in the midst of the altogether appropriate, yet profoundly tragic pain of your loss.